I’m starting a little late with a “mummy blog”. I’ve been busy trying to come to terms with the fact I am actually a mum. Like seriously!? I’m a mum. ME.
I’m only just starting to feel like a real life mum because Edwin is more responsive and he reaches out for me and touches my face and my heart explodes.
Those first months are really trying aren’t they? I just felt like a complete failure, like I was kidding myself to ever think I could actually do this. The cesarean threw me, wasn’t expecting to be cut open and then sent home with a tiny human I’d made and not be able to pick him up or be there for him.
I think I cried everyday. Stalking other mums on my Facebook to check I was normal. But no one else posted about bad stuff, which is totally understandable. But I want to post about the nights you scream into your pillow, and the time you called your baby a dickhead for keeping you up all night , then giving you a smile before sleeping at 7am then crying to yourself because you’re the worst mother in the universe.
I’m Aimee and I’m a first time mum. Welcome to my struggle.